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Joke of the Day

"Republican Health Plan Since Republicans are dismantling Obamacare, they wanted to coin a name for their new health plan. They came up with Nobodycare."

"Got excited because I found $20 in the laundry. Then I remembered my kids don't have jobs and the money was probably mine."

"Where is the only place engineers are considered artistic? Brooklyn"

"I bought these pants 50% off. I guess they're shorts now."

"Why did you buy me a pair of bunny ears? I wanted you to have a hoppy birthday!"

"Are you an old person? Because I would love to give you a stroke!"

"So a baby seal walks into a club..."

"What do you call a kid with no arms or legs. Names."

"Another bunny"

"I sometimes like to close my eyes and imagine a world with no poverty and also that my hand is a woman."