214447

Joke of the Day

"Hour 3: The group of hipsters has accepted me. However, the leader seems suspicious of the cinnamon roll man bun I taped on top of my head."

"We've just put the swimming pool up for the kids, not sure if I'm gonna hide in it, but I'm definitely gonna... Lilo"

"""I SHOULD HAVE KILLED YOU WHEN I HAD THE CHANCE,"" I scream, as a sudden gust of wind blows the spider I threw outside onto my face."

"Jewelry in my family gets passed down from generation to generation. My tongue ring used to be my grandmother's clit ring."

"Loads of people are lining up to buy my vampire teeth. Fang queue."

"Why was the ladybird kicked out of the forest? Because she was a litter bug."

"Q: Why is the most intelligent part of your body so intelligent? A: Because it nose."

"How many drinks do I buy a girl if I want her to come home with me and clean up my room?"

"How did Dairy Queen get pregnant? Burger King forgot to wrap his Whopper."

"Whats the difference between being horny and hungry? The difference is where you put the cucumber."