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Joke of the Day

"Kidnappers: We have your husband. Send us $10,000 if you ever want to see him again. Me: Where I should drop off his clothes?"

"What's the best way to get a Jewish girl's number? Roll up her sleeve."

"i hav cat-like reflexes ""prove it"" *looks at a cat* (instantly) i like that cat"

"*doctor looks up* I'm afraid you have forgetting about 80's bands disease ""Oh god what's The Cure?"" *doctor sighs* It's worse than I thought"

"A lion would NEVER cheat on his mate But a Tiger Wood. XD"

"I hate when girls have ""taken"" in their bio like that movie wasn't even that good"

"Why is China a communist country? Because nobody wants to hold an erection."

"I was told that exercise helps with your decision making. It's true. After going to the gym earlier I've decided I'm never going again."

"The American school system is a lot like an EA game... It's mostly broken and if you pay more money you can access things that make you have an advantage over everyone else."

"What did the Jewish pedophile say? Ay kid, go easy on the candy!"