214039

Joke of the Day

"Argon walks into a bar The bartender kicks him out. Argon doesn't react."

"I got really bad sunburn after falling asleep on my stomach at the beach... I wanted emergency medical attention but 911 never returned my call. I guess they put it on the back burner."

"What did the IT guy say to his wife after she complained about their love life? "" Did you try turning me off and on again?"""

"There's these 3 old ladies sitting on a bench. A guy comes up in a trench coat and flashes the 3 ladies. The first one has a stroke. The second one has a stroke. The third one couldn't reach."

"What do Aaron Hernandez and Jared Fogle now have in common? Matching uniforms."

"You have the nicest syntax I've ever seen."

"Q. What is one of the first things that Adam and Eve did after they were kicked out? A. They really raised Cain."

"What do you call a train when it's eating? A Chew-Chew Train! Side note, I have cheesy jokes for days."

"Have you seen that movie Constipated? It hasn't come out yet."

"last I dreamed.... I was a muffler. When I woke up I was exhausted."