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Joke of the Day

"First Monster: I'm so thirsty my tongue's hanging out. Second Monster: Oh. I thought that was your necktie!"

"It was Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve! - someone who believes in talking snakes"

"I was gonna tell a football joke to Payton Manning....... But it went over his head"

"What's blue and doesn't fit? A dead epileptic."

"Did you know King Solomon made love to 1000 virgins but he never enjoyed great sex :-P"

"HULK doesn't have sex, HULK smashes :b"

"Anytime I'm watching something on tv my wife starts talking to me as if her words are going to expire if she doesn't use them."

"I think we're looking at the NSA spying thing the wrong way, there are potential positives. Soon if you forget your email password you'll be able to ring the CIA and they'll remind you."

"When she said ""I think we got way too much pizza."" I knew I Finally had my chance to shine, to be the hero."

"All the adults who used to tell me ""When you're older you'll understand"" - I appreciate your optimism but have some bad news"