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Joke of the Day

"My wife asked me what I wanted to do for Easter So I told her ""The same thing Jesus did. Disappear on Friday and come back on Sunday."""

"What does my penis and bus have in common? They're both short"

"Why did the arena get hot after the game? All of the fans left"

"The first step of any project is to grossly underestimate its complexity and difficulty."

"When the punchline is in the title. What's the worst kind of joke?"

"Billy Joel was hospitalized last week. He had a heart attack ack ack ack ack ack. You oughtta know by now."

"Chuck Norris can hold his breathe for nine years."

"I'm getting really irritated. This is the tenth ATM I've been to in the last week that's had ""insufficient funds""."

"Paranoid? Nope. I'm just trying not to crash in case someone has replaced the airbag in my car with a boxing glove on a spring."

"What's the worst thing about having to kiss Grandma? When the damn coffin lid falls and hits you in the head."