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Joke of the Day
"I one the sandwich."
Next Joke
"The pun-ishment of notes When notes get in treble, bass-ically they get put behind bars. The alto-nate punishment is to push them off a clef and hope they land flat on sharp objects."
"Bad luck today, I have a bout of food poisioning AND I dropped my Galaxy Note 7 in the toilet by mistake :( Talk about explosive diarrhea."
"Cash or credit? Did you just assume my tender??"
"My parents never asked me to run away from home, but there were many unexplained one way tickets."
"I recently found out that they are reviving Full House. The show is called Fuller House, but Bob according to Bob Sagat, its called Filler House."
"What's the difference between Ozzy Osborne and Whitney Houston? One plays hard rock, the other is rock hard."
"How is Hillary Clinton and a high class prostitute different? Rich people pay the prostitute to fuck them, they pay Hillary Clinton to fuck everyone else."
"Why does Santa Clause have such a big sack? He only comes once a year."
"For some reason I'm only afraid of Middle Eastern spiders... It's O.K. though. My doctor says it's normal to be Iraqnaphobic."