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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the hipster compound? It's ionic."

"The ""self-lubricated catheter"" and the ""discreet pocket catheter"" have me rethinking what role catheters ought to be playing in my life."

"Sorry you stood next to me at the urinal in sandals, bro. What did we learn?"

"I RT you, you ignore me I fav you, you ignore me I ignore you, you ignore me This seems to be working out well for us"

"My ex-girlfriend always used to tell me I only think with my penis. A small part of me thinks she might have been right.."

"Bernie Sanders is like the Wizard of Oz... ...because he took Kansas by storm."

"Did you hear the one about the dog with no limbs named joint? Every morning his owner would take him out for a drag"

"What do you call a semiaquatic, furry little animal than never amounted to anything in it's life? An *otter* failure (I'll see myself out)"

"Went to the hospital to wish a pregnant lady giving birth a Happy Labor Day and she ripped my throat out :("

"Decided to watch the lunar eclipse tonight... Couldn't see the moon"