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Joke of the Day
"did you hear about that kidnapping in Texas? He woke up."
Next Joke
"Why are Black people so fast? [Don't say it in public] ... because all the slow ones are in Jail"
"Donald and Hillary walk into a presidential debate. And America walks out"
"what kind of vegetable is the hypest a turnup obvs"
"(Man hobbles into grocery store using a cane) 5: HEY MOM THAT MAN IS USING A WALKING STICK BC HIS BONES AREN'T STRONG & HE'LL DIE SOON RIGHT"
"My friends call me Superman, not because I help people, its because I wear the same clothes everyday"
"Can you open your mouth without showing your teeth? You're hired."
"What did Mario tell his girlfriend when he broke up with her? ...It's not a you, it's a me, Mario!"
"I've got a runny nose. edit: thanks for the cold!"
"ME: *staring into my lover's eyes in the midst of a warm embrace* HER: What are you thinking? ME: *caressing her cheek* I forgot your name."