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Joke of the Day
"Why do elephants paint their toenails red? So they can hide in strawberry patches."
Next Joke
"LPT: Microwave your spoon first to make scooping out ice cream easier. It warms up the spoon and makes the process less frustrating."
"I was going to be a politician for Halloween Then I realized I couldn't fit my head up my ass"
"Why do black people have nightmares? Because the last guy who had a dream got shot"
"I have somewhere around 300 karma I intend to drop it to 0 by having human-like opinions on the wrong subreddits"
"What should you do if you see your TV floating? Turn on the lights and shoot the black guy."
"Why were there only 40,000 Mexicans at the Battle of the Alamo? They only had 2 trucks"
"What does the Mafia and pussies have in common? One slip of the tongue, and you're in deep shit"
"when I run out of spoons that tells me its probably time to do the dishes .. or quit heroine, whichever."
"If rivers could speak, which river would always say no? Da Nile"