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Joke of the Day
"My new girlfriend is a sandwich artist and she's really into roll play"
Next Joke
"So my genetics professor reported this morning that diarrhea has a genetic basis According to her, it runs in our jeans."
"My veterinarian told me to stop feeding my cows round bales of hay... they don't provide a square meal"
"Baltimore, eat a snickers. You turn into Ferguson when you're hungry."
"""Do you know why I pulled you over?"" ""You thought I'd like your pretty lights?"" ""Recite the alphabet backwards"" ""I can't even do that sober"""
"No matter how angry you get about something... ... you can't any angrier than a midget with a yo-yo."
"Wife: you're so damn forgetful! M: oh nonsense! W: ok, did you get the cat food? M: WE HAVE A CAT??"
"A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office wrapped wrapped in cellophane.... The psychiatrist says ""well, I can clearly see your nuts"""
"Where do I see myself in five years? *kicks feet up on desk* Sir, does my resume list ""psychics abilities"" under skills? No. Next question."
"What does 100% humidity mean? Even dry farts feel like wet farts."