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Joke of the Day

"Someone talking about something passionately automatically makes them 10 times cuter, unless it's Hitler... Then it's only nein times cuter"

"need a last minute valentine's day gift for that special lady? why not give her the timeless gift of my phone number"

"Whenever I speak to religious people about my beliefs, I receive a lot of judgement. It seems that Jesus is the only one who truly accepts me for who I am!"

"Do Indian restaurants have any bread? Nah, they have Naan."

"How many birds does it take to change a lightbulb? Toucan"

"Scientists are now saying they may never discover what LinkedIn is for."

"What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tank? Men, get in the tank."

"What is the difference between your mom and Kim Kardashian? One is a dirty whore and the other is Kim Kardashian."

"What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in, Robin."

"""The past tense of LOL is not LOL'd, it's L'dOL."" - How I like to end a date with 18-25 year old girls."