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Joke of the Day

"whats the worst part about cooking vegetables? putting the wheelchair into the oven."

"Did you hear about the half-assed hitman? He assinated his targets."

"The best thing about fucking 26 year olds is... there's 26 of them."

"Why did the integer drown? Because it can't float."

"AGE 18: There's someone special out there for you! AGE 28: You'll find them one day! AGE 38: It'll happen! DEAD: Just be patient!"

"They say there is a murderer in every group I thought it's jack, so i killed him before he could harm somebody."

"What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One is really heavy, the others a little lighter."

"Another Dutch joke about the Belgiums Two Belgians are walking in the desert with a car door. One of them complains that its too hot. The other one says: ""just roll down the window."""

"Facebook should have a relationship status called: Fu*k I don't know....Ask her"

"Can I man and a woman have sex while running? By principle, yes. By practicality, no. Because a woman runs faster with her skirt up than a man with his pants down."