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Joke of the Day
"How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb? Fish"
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"I try to work the song Uptown Funk into every conversation. Don't believe me? Just watch!"
"Whats black and white and red all over? A [removed]paper"
"The Obama Administration just created 100 million jobs @ Dell and Comcast by cutting power in India."
"Growing up, whenever I told my father, 'It's really nice out!'... He'd reply, 'Yeah, I had it out a minute ago, I thought it was great, too!' And so went my childhood..."
"What was the other reindeer's name? Olive. EDIT: Please don't explain and let those suffer who don't understand"
"Why did the fish's car break down? It needed a tuna-up."
"In response to the Country Singer lightbulb joke, how many guitarists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 13. 1 to do it, and 12 to say they could do it better."
"What do Taylor Swift and Charlie Sheen have in common? Bad blood."
"Who was the last person to have sex with Marilyn Monroe? Thomas Noguchi"