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Joke of the Day

"Let the bodies hit the floor? Ok but first let me put down some plastic this is new carpet I don't want to ruin it my mom will be pissed"

"""Honey, you're not really nice to your son"" ""Which one do you mean? Steve, John or the fat one?"""

"What does Samuel Jackson say when he is mugging you? What's in your wallet?"

"What do you call a pot head with down syndrome? A bongoloid."

"What do you call Batman after getting beat of by the Joker? Bruiced Wayne."

"Research says that if you're afraid of spiders, you're most likely to find them in your bedroom. I'm afraid of men with accents so..."

"Why couldn't the lizard get it up? He had ereptile dysfunction."

"Barista: How do you take your coffee? Me: Orally."

"Last year I joined a support group for antisocial people.we haven't met yet."

"How do you spot a sumo at a feminist rally? Look for the one with shaved legs...."