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Joke of the Day

"I always start crying uncontrollably whenever I am about to get intimate with a girl . . . . . . Any good tips with dealing with pepper spray?"

"Women: Let me over-think everything you just said, connect them to things you said years ago and pick a fight about it when you least expect"

"What's the correct term for an americano without cream or sugar? an African Americano"

"If you see a cat with a dart in it, that's my cat and I need him back, we aren't done yet."

"Why do Egyptian farts smell the same? They have toots in common."

"If the waitress doesn't have a visible tattoo the restaurant is usually too expensive for me."

"What did the little boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves. Just kidding, he hasn't opened them yet."

"A Spanish magician is performing a trick. He says ""I will disappear in Uno, Dos... -"" He vanished without a tres."

"Two months ago my teacher asked me the name of the clothes indian women wear. Is it too late now to say ""sari""?"

"A man has three testicles. He goes to the doctor and says, ""Doc, I have one more testicle than you."" The doctor replies, ""Really? You have eight?"""