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Joke of the Day
"I have eight words to say to you...."
Next Joke
"What's the most fucked up joke you know that is not racist in any way? Lemme have it."
"Cookie Monster delivering the eulogy at Bert's funeral. Head bowed low. Stillness. ""Me want cookies,"" he sadly intones. ""Me want cookies."""
"Not now ex-boyfriend. Someone favorited 2 of my tweets. I'm a huge deal around there now & you lost your chance. Just kidding. What time?"
"Three blind lesbians walk into a fish market. They get confused"
"In English there's a word for fucking everything. It's 'pansexual'"
"Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says, ""Boy it sure is hot in here!"" the other muffin says, ""HOLY SHIT! A talking muffin!!"""
"I eat slowly, so I can't ever live in Moscow. Everyone's Russian there."
"I may not be the sharpest sandwich in the tree, but put my pants on one sleeve at a time just like you. Do you have any cookies?"
"How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, lawyers only screw us."