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Joke of the Day

"If Adrian Peterson is banned from the NFL, he can always try baseball. Who doesn't need a switch hitter?!"

"What did the doctor call his new metal band? Inflamed"

"I like my women like I like my coffee: All over my lap while I'm driving."

"What Type of Fruit Wants to Run Away and Get Married but Isn't Able to? Cantelope."

"What did the poplar tree say to the weeping willow? Hey pal, you just need to branch out more."

"INTERVIEWER: Would you like a donut? ME: *takes three* I: Um, ok, what's your greatest strength? ME: [grabbing two more donuts] Self-control"

"Why should you attend someone's funeral although you know they won't be attend yours back? Because they will be at your funeral in spirit"

"I hate jokes that leaves you hanging. They [Deleted]"

"What do you call a black brick with three holes in it? A polish bowling ball."

"I was admitted to hospital suffering a severe case of sexual frustration but after 48 hours I discharged myself."