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Joke of the Day

"The message in a bottle is probably my favorite form of communication that involves throwing garbage in the ocean."

"*man invents wheel* ""How can we possibly improve this?"" *Man invents wheel of cheese* ""Nailed it!"""

"My ex-girlfriend once said ""It's either me or Twitter."" I wonder how she's doing."

"I like to tell self-referential jokes. Like this one"

"What idiot called it Oktoberfest instead of Octo-Bar?"

"Why did peanut butter flop at the talent show? He didn't have the right jam."

"Music star Kenny Rogers announced his retirement yesterday. In other news, Kenny Rogers is still alive, apparently."

"Whoever got my Steam account for Christmas plz realize those Japanese dress up games are for research only, I don't enjoy them. Plz understa"

"My grandfather said he'd never be caught dead wearing cargo pants, so I slipped the funeral director an extra 50 bucks. And now we wait."

"The minute the great man dies, cryogenics should be employed until a cure is found for old age and chest problems... Freeze Nelson Mandela!"