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Joke of the Day

"I never mess with anyone in a Pontiac Aztek. I just don't want to be on the wrong end of another of their poor decisions."

"Heard this one at work today I called out order number 404 Guy comes up and says ""I thought I would never find it!"""

"My neighbors thought the tombstones in my yard were festive until they saw their pets' names scrawled on them."

"Bill Cosby played running back at Temple University. They were a real sleeper this season finishing 10-3."

"what do you call it when 3 muppets have sex together? - Mena Menage a trois"

"I am so hot my mother calls me sun."

"I just got awake from sleep, after 61 days April Fools :D got it ; 61 days ..earlier ..from today right, no ? alright move on :|"

"*phone rings* Wife: ""Quick! Pretend I'm not in!"" Me (a dad): ""Hello. Yes my wife is here. Hey, Not In. It's for you."" Wife: ""...."""

"Nice guys finish last, cause stamina."

"Have you ever heard of the lost Indian tribe the Halarwi? they walk around the forest saying ""were the halarwi"""