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Joke of the Day

"How many Avengers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. Ant-Man and Wasp are the only ones small enough to fit inside a lightbulb."

"This year I'm the Invisible Man for Halloween, according to this bartender that apparently hasn't seen me standing here for an hour"

"My girlfriend and I were fighting in the car We glared at eachother and I thought neither of us would back down, but in the end we struck an Accord."

"India launched a rocket to Mars yesterday... That's a heck of a place to put a call center."

"I'm always creeped out by the guy who seems to know the age of consent laws a little too well."

"I have an excellent memory... I cant even remember the last time i forgot something."

"June Bugs are like College Dropouts They sleep all day, they party at night, and after a month, you don't see them anymore.."

"How did Donald Trump earn his millions? He started with his dad's billions."

"honk if it's easier 2 love strangers than the ppl closest 2 u"

"I told my cat she was adopted and now she's not talking to me."