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Joke of the Day

"I don't see why we Brits don't celebrate 4th of July Surely 240 years of being officially seperate from America is something to be happy about"

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"What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can roast beef but you can't pee soup."
"Hair is like fitness... If you don't condition, it'll suck (I'm sorry for nothing)"
"A post at night is like a land mine You have to happen upon it to blow on"
"Archaeologists discover the remains of a slave-worker under famous statue in Giza Reports claim he died of Asphinxiation"
"Whats the last thing that went through Sally's mind after jumping from a skyscraper? Her ankles."
"They're always telling me to live my dreams. But I love my d*ck! I don't want it to be sliced off by the women I cheated on..."
"Do you like Wendy's? Reply: Yes! Answer: you like it when deez nuts in yo face"
"what kind of pants does the godfather wear? al pa-chinos"
"Why don't mexicans have checking accounts? It's too hard to spray paint your name on the little line."