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Joke of the Day
"Happy Birthday Girlfrien. I didn't put the D because you'll get that later."
Next Joke
"An art thief gets caught after a heist, how so? Many people saw his Van Gogh from the scene of the crime."
"You know you're an alcoholic when... ...your local liquor store is moving and they come to your house for boxes."
"What did Einstein eat as a baby? Formula!"
"What's one thing you never want to hear your wife say while having sex? ""Honey, I'm home!"""
"I accidentally emailed my essay to the 3D printer It came out as a piece of shit"
"""*RING**RING* in the middle Of night! ""Hello?"" ""Hey man are you home?"" ""No dude i just picked up my house phone from Burger King."""
"Me and a friend.. Walk into a pet store and the employee asks ""Anything that I can help you find?"" and then proceeded to kick us out. apparently dinner wasn't the right answer."
"The paleo diet is to eat only foods cavemen would have eaten. So, fruity pebbles, cocoa pebbles, the oatmeal with little dinosaur eggs, etc."
"How can you tell if a person is a vegetarian? Don't worry. They'll tell you they're a vegetarian."