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Joke of the Day

"My friend asked me, what rhymes with Reddit? I said: No it doesn't"

"What did the japanese chef do after he dishonored the emperor? Commit sushi"

"Did you hear about Stevie Wonder getting a cheese grater for his birthday? He said it was the most violent book he'd ever read."

"Did you guys hear about the new business shopping center in Pepto County? They're calling it the Pepto Biz Mall"

"Ma'am, I never said your baby is ugly. In fact, I have not even seen it. However, the aardvark in your stroller is adorable."

"I wish lap dance minutes felt like treadmill minutes."

"if someone wakes up from a twenty year coma, i hope the first thing they see when they turn on a TV is mike tyson petting his pigeons."

"Either people up north are getting friendlier or it's the spring-like weather because I was just told to ""please"" go fuck myself."

"A lawyer and a catfish What is the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a scum sucking bottom feeder and the other is a fish."

"Purely a Fable One day, long, long ago, there lived a woman who did not whine, nag, or bitch... But that was a long time ago and it was just that one day."