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Joke of the Day

"Okay stranger, it's clear that we walk at the exact same pace, speed up or at least hold my hand."

"Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar One says, ""I've lost an electron."" The other says, ""Are you sure?"" The first replies, ""Yes, I'm positive."""

"Damon girl, did you fall from heaven? Because your face sure shows it."

"Baby I'm no weather man but you can expect a few inches tonight "

"How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? They don't. They just beat up the room for being dark and arrest the light for being broke."

"Where do I see myself in ten years? I don't know. Let me think. *pictures self riding jet ski made of bones through space*"

"New Band I recently started a new band: We have to play every song in a certain order and we all have to be symmetrical on stage. We're called OC/DC."

"A rapist, paedophile and priest enter a bar. He orders a beer."

"I don't believe Africans poach rhinos. They don't have enough water to fill a pan that size."

"How do you call the piece of fat around the vagina? A woman."