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Joke of the Day

"If I ever get attacked by a shark I can only hope that I'm smart enough to get out at least one Jaws quote before I go under."

"Apparently you can make a career out of exhaling It's called a blowjob"

"Don't tell me I can hear the ocean if I put a shell up to my ear. If he has something to say to me SAY IT TO MY FACE U PIECE OF SHIT WATER"

"""You know who needs more attention? Celebrities. Maybe we could give them trophies or something."" Good idea, Oscar. What'd you have in mind?"

"I'll do a lot of things for money, but I draw the line at working..."

"If you take the D out of Devil what do you get? D"

"PJ time - Slogan behind an auto rickshaw I couldn't afford Volkswagen. Thus, Auto"

"It's not 'stealing tweets' if you believe in recycling."

"Ketchup bottle farts are just as funny as people farts."

"Cannibalism isn't funny Although, it depends on a person's taste..."