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Joke of the Day

"A parrot named Nigel leaves home and returns home,4 years later, speaking Spanish It's pretty common, all the language majors I knew moved back in with their parents too."

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"Abortion jokes never get old."
"What did one cloud of fog say to the other? I don't know. It's a Mistery."
"Not all Girl Scouts are nice. Some silent fart while you're filling out the paperwork for Thin Mints and they don't even say they're sorry."
"What are the loud, metal things that the Japanese hit? American ships."
"Did you hear about the guy who went to the ER with 15 little toy ponies stuck up in his rear end? Doctors say his condition is stable."
"I really like non-sequiters But I prefer irony."
"What do you call something that is long hard and full of semen? A Submarine."
"A Man Loses His Eye in a Fight The first thing he says to his eye doctor is: ""Eye didn't see it coming."""
"Me: I weigh 10x more than the cat and yet she trusts me completely. So sweet. You: Me: You: It's a lot more than 10x. Me: Don't ruin this."