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Joke of the Day

"""911"" you gotta help, my wife is in labour in the backseat ""how far apart are the contractions?"" about 2 miles but I'm driving pretty fast"

"Why did the man's kidneys fail? They didn't study."

"I love this joke today Knock, knock. ""Who's there?"" 9/11 ""9/11 who?"" You said you would never forget! Sorry if this has been posted recently.. Could be too soon?"

"In a parallel universe nobody can park."

"What do you call it if you put an IED on an Italian? Rigatoni!"

"I heard that San Francisco had to change their team name to the 29ers this year... because 20 of them left in the offseason."

"What is a moo hoo for a delightful ranch owner? A charmer farmer!"

"Where to dogs who lost their tails go? To a retail store."

"A sheep, a drum and a snake fall down a cliff.. Bahh, dum, hiss"

"A blond and a brunette jump off the empire state building... Who lands first? The brunette. The blond had to stop and ask for directions."