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Joke of the Day

"Mountains are funny. They're hill areas."

"Half Life 3 was going to be released several years ago... ...But the voice actor for Gordon Freeman was supposed to announce it, and no-one can find him."

"My friend told me he holds a world record in quilt making I suspect his whole story is fabricated."

"A black guy walks into a bar, with a parrot on his shoulder The bartender looks at him and says, ""That thing is really cool! Where did you get it?"" The parrot replies, ""Detroit"""

"Q: What do you get if you cross a pig with a karate expert? A: A pork chop."

"How did the hipster burn his tongue? He drank his tea before it was cool."

"What do you call an Arab riding a camel with a goat on a leash? Bisexual."

"Current anger level: I am last-beer-in-the-fridge-turns-out-to-be-a-soy-sauce-bottle angry."

"What did the mushroom put in his bio for the online dating service? Im a fungi"

"Why did Thor file a police report? Because someone stole his thunder."