208166

Joke of the Day

"Why did the Country Bear Jamboree bear blush? Because he was a bear a-singing. ..... I am at Disney with the kids this week..."

"my anaconda don't want none unless you got snake food this time. last time u tried to feed him buns but the carbs are bad for him"

"Just saw a license plate that said ""LUV SLUG."" I hope it shrivels up when they salt the roads in the winter."

"What's the most useful material? Scratch. You can make anything from scratch."

"*interrupts parent & child on bus* Actually thats not true, Wolverine has died many times *they get up* Your mother cant shelter you forever"

"i just foumd out that humpty dumpty is suposed to be an egg. nowhere in the humpty dumpty poem does it say that humpty dumpty is a egg"

"Congratulations, outspoken atheists! You've made not having a religion into your religion!"

"What do you get when you cut an avocado into 6.022x10^23 pieces? Guacamole."

"What did one math book say to the other math book? We've got a lot of problems."

"My wife has two weeks left to live... Then I'm going to stab her."