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Joke of the Day

"[girl chatting up guy at bar] girl: so what do you do? magician: i halve a girlfriend"

"Smile and the world smiles with you. Laugh and the world wants you to stop looking at your phone and drive."

"Guy: Do you like Cds? Girl: Um, sure that's a weird question why? Guy: Cuz u about to see deez nuts!"

"Why does Japan have such a low obesity rate? They don't want to see their little boy grow into a fat man."

"I ate a small Wookie steak for dinner... ...it was a little Chewie."

"Excuse are like cakes Fat people are full of them"

"I bought crappy music for 5 cents today, but the guy ripped me off. As he ran off, I yelled ""Hey, I want my nickel back!"""

"I want to give a shoutout to sidewalks For keeping me off the streets."

"These days, lots of things get either exported or imported Except Mexicans, they get deported."

"The next time you make fun of a ginger, put yourself in their shoes. You'll know how bad it hurts to not have a sole."