207525

Joke of the Day

"Give a man a fish, and he'll ask for a lemon; teach a man to fish and he'll leave work early on Fridays."

"Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they're really good at it."

"What did the /r/science mod say to the user? [removed]"

"I own a very profitable bakery I guess you could say, i'm rolling in the dough"

"Where did Mario and Luigi go to school? At 'Wass-a-matta U'"

"""How do you know that God isn't a woman?"" Because I'm not a sandwich."

"Peanut Butter So I was balls deep in peanut butter, and I thought to myself, ""Peanut Butter's a weird name for a dog, isn't it?"""

"Judge should've sentenced Lindsay Lohan to watch her own movies... oh wait, that's cruel & unusual punishment."

"How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? fish."

"What did one gay sperm say to the other? How are we supposed to find an egg in all this shit?"