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Joke of the Day

"A man is walking around a costume party dressed in green with a woman on his shoulder When asked what he was he said he was a tortoise. Then when asked about the woman he replied ""she's Michelle""."

"What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter-pounder with cheese."

"A priest and a rabbi are in a boat they approach a bridge over the river and see a young boy standing there. The priest says to the rabbi ""Should we fuck him?"" The rabbi replies ""Out of what?"""

"Wanna hear a joke? Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay's man house knock knock you: who's there? the chicken."

"Personally, I'm fine with what Reddit's admins are doing. It's fun watching them Digg their own grave."

"What is the title of a show where children pawn items? Child Pawnography"

"What did the author say when he added a chapter about flour to a story about soup? The plot thickens!"

"[gf falls asleep during a movie] ME: aw [i get a blanket] ME: *hitting her w/ the blanket* wake up ur missing the part with gollum's riddles"

"What's the fastest liquid on earth? Milk. It's pasteurized before you see it."

"I formed a band with my therapy group. It was fun for a while, but we couldn't make it big. Our album 'Appetite for Self-Destruction' didn't do well with the critics."