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Joke of the Day

"Marriage is like Disneyland. Magical at first but then you realize that there's someone else in the Mickey suit."

"A good groaner What do you get when you combine an elephant and a poodle? A dead poodle, split in half."

"No matter how kind you are german kids are Kinder"

"Count Dracula survived on the blood of 18 year old virgins for Millennia... He died last year."

"If money doesn't grow on trees... Then why do banks have branches?"

"When people say ""Let's not get off on the wrong foot here"", I reply ""Please don't get off on either of my feet""."

"Pro Tip for the ladies. Ask him to show you where the ""jack thingy"" is at in the trunk and when he shows you.. That's when you push him in."

"The World Trade Centre ordered pizza They wanted pepperoni but all they got was plain"

"What do a teenage girl and her baby have in common? They're both thinking, ""Oh shit! My mom's gonna kill me."""

"one kindergarten student to another ""did you hear they found a condom on the seventh floor balcony?"" the other student replies ""Oooh no... but... what is a 'balcony'?"""