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Joke of the Day

"I just took out a spider so big that, moments after, the postman rang the doorbell and I thought it was the spider."

"I know a good dad joke. But I have to wait for Dad to come back to tell."

"My girlfriend accidentally shoved a pair of glasses up my ass... Now my hindsight is 20/20"

"After (M)onday and (T)uesday even the week says WTF!"

"I was going to post that I'm in Nebraska but Foursquare didn't have the location ""Someone shoot me in the face"" listed."

"Biggest Jewish Dilemma? Free Bacon!!"

"What is another name for a Jewish guest? A visitorah Sorry"

"What do you get when you mix an elephant and a rhino? elephino. (Hell if I know)"

"Two women are gardening when one pulls up a huge carrot, she says ""this reminds me of my husband"" and the other woman says, ""that big?"" and the first one says ""No, that dirty."""

"I have a problem with taking things literally. My attorney advises me that it's called 'theft'."