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Joke of the Day

"Truth: My 85yr old grandmother's answering machine says, ""I'll call you back when I want to, if I want to."" Heroes are all around us."

"Valve should be in charge of the UN... It's the only sure-fire way to prevent World War 3."

"Why did Karl Marx dislike Earl Grey? Because all proper tea is theft."

"if you told a kid that their parents died or that their balloon flew away, you'd get the same reaction."

"When you first learn about the Banach-Tarski Paradox it sounds cool... ...but, when you break it down, you'll realize you've actually seen it twice."

"What does a black man and a tornado have in common? It only takes one to ruin a neighborhood."

"""I'm so glad that pasting that text included the format of the original document!"" -- No one. Ever."

"So I heard they've leaked the working title of the Reeva Steenkamp biography... ""I'd rather die standing than live on my knees."""

"What do you call a black dinosaur? Tyroneosaurus-Rex."

"I work 24/7 - which is about 3.42 hours."