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Joke of the Day

"How did the psychiatrist break his leg? He had a Freudian slip."

"""You hang UP."" ""No, YOU hang UP."" - Movie theater workers arguing about hanging movie poster for Up."

"Why is it the only thing a woman wants out of a man these days is security? Well it's the first thing they say when I approach them."

"So I heard the guy who invented anagrams died today... May he erect a penis."

"What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One doesn't scream when you put it in an oven"

"The Cheesiest Joke I Know What did the cracker say to the slice of cheddar? ""Say, you're looking mighty sharp today!"" To which the cheddar replied, ""Fuck you, white boy."""

"If I were Russian I'd be Vladimir Poopin"

"Why do Scuba divers fall backwards into the water? Because if they fell forwards, they'd still be in the boat"

"Penn State Prefers to be losing at half time.. Because at Penn State they like when you are a little behind in the locker room. - South Park"

"The doctor said I had a bad case of kyphosis. ""Are you sure?"" I said. He replied, ""Honestly, it's just a hunch."" Edit: [Jokes are funnier when explained](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kyphosis)."