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Joke of the Day

"I went to Africa to help with the Ebola crisis. When I left, my mentor said thanks and told me that all of Africa was behind me. I instinctively reached for my wallet."

"What is the difference between a peeping tom and a pickpocket? A pickpocket snatches watches"

"My Asian friend said he had erection anxiety... I said: ""what do you mean?"" He said: ""I don't want to see the dick rise to power."""

"If I've learned anything from the Kardashians it's that I shouldn't let my complete lack of talent hold me back."

"What does person with Alzheimer's call What Are You Wearing Today? What Am I Wearing Today"

"This morning I was wondering why the sun wasn't rising... And then it dawned on me"

"Why do hippies like corduroy? Because the material is so groovy."

"An Irish girl tells her mom she decided to be a prostitute. her mom says ""A WHAT""?!! The daughter says ""a prostitute"" then the mom says ""thank god... I thought you said a Protestant"""

"What did the egg say to the pot of boiling water? Its going to take me a while to get hard because I was just laid."

"The rest of you just need to get fat because I don't feel like going to the gym anymore..."