205750
Joke of the Day
"People say Money talks... But all mine says is Goodbye."
Next Joke
"When someone's ignoring me I like to break into their house at night and steal all their shoes. We'll see how busy you are tomorrow."
"The police knocked on my door and told me my dog was chasing some fella on a bike. I said fuck off my dog ain't even got a bike."
"What do you get when you cross a chili pepper, a shovel, and a dachshund? A hot diggity dog."
"Why should you always knock on your fridge door before opening it? Because there could be an Italian dressing inside."
"I don't want to make a political joke It might get elected as president of the United States"
"Dude got his foot cut off, poor guy had to give up drinking milk. He lacked toes."
"""Found"" a nest of ground bees and got stung multiple times. But I was able to remove all the stingers. So yes, my pullout game is strong."
"Me: Ugh! I never know what to say in these situations... Friend: You say 'good morning' back"
"""Guess I'll turn on the news to see what the government is up to"" - The President of the United States"