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Joke of the Day

"Why do the /r/jokes moderators like chess? It's the only chance they have to mate."

"What do the final scene of titanic and the iPhone 7 have in common? They both could've fit the jack"

"Did you hear about the failed mission to Antarctica? Their journey went south."

"What beer goes best with pizza? Pepper-Peroni"

"I wish I could see the look of surprise and wonder on my son's face when he opens his lunchbox full of tampons today. Payback for talkback."

"I assume the #1 reason people change their identity is b/c they answered ""You too"" when the barista said ""Enjoy your bagel."""

"My friend from Mexico got bit by a mosquito.. he could not figure out why his American friend was not receiving bites as well. I told him the bugs were hungry for Mexican tonight."

"What happens when a dick meets a hardass? Well... Fuck."

"I could try taking matters into my own hands... But it just doesn't do it for me."

"[Morgan Freeman voice] Isolated from his group, this penguin will not survive [penguin voice] Hey dude, I can hear you."