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Joke of the Day

"Don't you hate when you take a power nap and wake up 22 hours later and everybody at work is staring at you?"

"Did you hear about the new emo website? Check it out it's www.emo.com/wrists"

"What's wrong with the sentence ""Jack and Jill is playing in the field?"" Women should be first."

"What kind of a battery does Dj Khaled use? A Li-ion battery."

"I broke my finger last week On the other hand, I am okay."

"9 volt battery and assholes A woman's asshole is like a 9 volt battery. You know you shouldn't, but soon or later you're gonna put your tongue on it!"

"The guys that taught me every medicine joke I know just arrived at my doorstep. I decided to in-vitamin."

"After sex, a girl once told me I had a small penis. She was cool, though. She never told any of her friends... She never told anyone. Anything. Ever. Again."

"I accepted the Microsoft terms and conditions without reading them, and apparently I'm now responsible for hemming all of Bill Gates' pants."

"I'm jealous of Santa... ...he can yell ""hoe hoe hoe"" at anyone and get away with it."