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Joke of the Day

"Potter household Voldemort: knock knock James: who's there? Voldemort: you know James: you know who? Voldemort: correct James: James: Fuck"

"Did you hear about the blind guy who got in a car accident? He regained his sight in ICU."

"I was told I could view the eclipse through a colander. I think I strained my eyes"

"So, if 4 out of 5 people suffer some medical condition, does that mean the other 1 person enjoys it?"

"I told this girl I'd date the shit out of her But I guess she doesn't like coprophiles."

"I wouldn't want lesbian parents. Not because I'm homophobic. I just don't want to get stuck in an endless loop of ""Go ask your mother."""

"What do you call an explosion in a Frencg kitchen? Linoleum Blown-apart."

"I'm diabetic, and I can't eat sweets It'll cost me an arm and a leg. (It's ok for me to post this, cos I am actually a diabetic)"

"""Chill out."" - Spanish receptionist saying Jill isn't in."

"I'm trying to write a joke with the word ""cunt"" But I cunt."