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Joke of the Day
"""Chill out."" - Spanish receptionist saying Jill isn't in."
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"Whats the difference between a house cat and a polecat ? How much their husbands make"
"Why does Torque live on campus? Because cross products don't commute!"
"What is the opposite of Polygamy? > What is the opposite of Polygamy? Monotony"
"Why did the guy have Ben Franklin tattooed on his dick? His girlfriend was great at blowing 100 bucks."
"*Runs fingers over Braille calendar* Is this a date? It feels like a date."
"I haven't eaten since last year, so why haven't I slimmed down?"
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Cereal ! Cereal who ? Cereal pleasure to meet you !"
"I bet the kids who TP'd my yard last night and didn't know that toilet paper was on my grocery list, feel pretty stupid right about now"
"When asking a girl out it's important to show you respect her. Try writing your number on a Tubman Twenty so she knows your a feminist."