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Joke of the Day

"[prehistoric times] MUM: When you get married, your husband will be the hunter DAUGHTER: So I gather"

"How do you kill a fox? Cut off a leg and make it run across Canada"

"Life Advice Never argue with an idiot. They'll drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience."

"Did you hear that Tote's have brought out a line of spherical candies of suprisingly high quality? They're totes amazeballs."

"How do you stop a dog from barking in July? Shoot him in June."

"gotta love cousins... what do you call a hispanic man who's car got jacked? Carlos. what do you call the italian man who stole it? Carmine."

"I invented a new joke today! Plagiarism!"

"What does a rapist wear to feel sexy? Cologne."

"Why didn't the man go to dat place? Cuz dis-place-ment a lot to him."

"What's the hardest part to eat of a vegetable? The wheelchair"