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Joke of the Day

"Life Advice Never argue with an idiot. They'll drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience."

"What did the Spannish Amoeba said to the other Amoebas? ""Hola Amoebas!"""

"Me: lets go get a drink! Friend: what's the occasion? Me: ... Friend: ... Me: I don't understand the question."

"So hoola hoops are a thing again... I figured they'd swing in to style again eventually!"

"Why does Hillary Clinton want to have sex with Bill Clinton first thing in the morning? She wants to be the first lady."

"What did the mama bison say to her son when he went off to college Bison. :> get it?"

"Why did everyone want to invite the mushroom to the party... Cause he was a fungi"

"Got a HJ (""handjob"") from a FRUIT! [NSFW if you can't have handjob jokes @ W] He gave apple and made me kumquats!"

"never trust a person who says they don't like chocolate, even dogs eat chocolate and it kills them"

"You can reduce your weight by one simple exercise of shaking your head horizontally. Do it when you are offered food"