204818

Joke of the Day

"I finally found a book where the love interest is a grandfather clock It's about fucking time"

"What time of day is it in France right now? Mourning"

"I'm against picketing. I'm just not sure how to show it..."

"What's the difference between a homeless wanker and a pimp? One's a broke stroker and the other is a stroke broker."

"So, is Dora 18 yet, or what? Asking for a friend."

"A lettuce, a tomato and a pumpkin had a race The pumpkin fell down squash. The tomato tried to ketchup, but the lettuce came out ahead"

"Kanye tryin to get a parrot to talk, says to him: Polly want a cracker? Parrot look at Kanye, say Nigger want a watermelon?"

"Last night after we had sex I asked my wife if she was faking it and she said ""no, I really was asleep."""

"Donald Trump The joke's in the title."

"[camping] ""Dad I'm afraid a raccoon is gonna come in my tent and eat me"" -don't be silly. It'll probably be a bear. Sleep tight."