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Joke of the Day

"If I am farther than you in candy crush I will automatically think im smarter than you."

"Knock Knock. Christmas. Who's there? Oops, looks like Christmas came early this year."

"Obama will go down in history as America's first gold president."

"A doctor goes to his patient and says ""I have some bad news, you have cancer and you have alzheimer's"" Patient replies ""Well, at least I don't have cancer!"""

"What sex position produces the ugliest kids? Ask your mom. (Sorry if this has already been posted)"

"We Found Love in a Swollen Face Chris Brown ft. Rihanna"

"What's common between a crying baby and a gun? You must not bring either to the movies."

"Hubby's ex emailed him wanting to ""reconnect"". I wanna pretend to be him & set it up so I can re CONNECT my foot up her ass"

"What do you call the 72 virgins that Allah gave isis? Goats"

"I'm on the steak diet. You just have four steaks for breakfast, four for lunch, then a sensible dinner of six steaks."