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Joke of the Day

"remember when everyone was worried we'd reached ""peak TV"" with too much to watch then it turned out we're a tragic nation of unending racism"

"This nation really has gotten lazy, what with buying pre-shredded cheese and all. I think it's time to make America grate again."

"What's the difference between a mouth and an asshole?..... Some people can't figure out which one to speak out of."

"What do you call it when two well endowed astrophysicists have a gay sword fight? A Large Hardon Collider."

"I went to a strawberry picking competition the other day, a woman with no arms and legs won it. Jammy cunt."

"Wanted to do something patriotic today so I bought a gun and fifty Big Macs."

"A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants... Bartender asks him ""Why do you have a steering wheel in your pants?"" Pirate responds, ""Aaar, It's driving me nuts!"""

"What did the lighter color shade tell to its dark lover? I want hue."

"I married a moonshiners daughter Now she makes me liquor"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Baron ! Baron who ? Baron mind who you're talking to !"