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Joke of the Day

"Don't forget to pay your taxes this year so the Government can give it to people that don't work as hard as you."

"Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection - except one. He's never gonna give you Up."

"Why do Sumo Wrestler's shave their bodies? So that they don't get mistaken for feminists"

"My best friend told me that he had super powers... ... I told him to suck his own dick."

"What did the fresh egg say to the boiling pot of water? ""It's going to take me a while to get hard, I just got laid this morning."""

"Aw, crap, I just ate a silica gel pack. Why didn't I take seriously the ""Do Not Eat"" warning on it? It just looked so effin' delicious."

"When/why do feminists hate cannibals? When they make sandwiches, because they're man-spreading."

"Hark work never killed anybody But why take the risk."

" You better watch out, you better not cry, you better not pout, I'm telling you why. Life gets worse when you're an adult. "

"How to catch a polar bear Cut a hole in the ice. Surround the hole with frozen peas. When the bear walks up to take a pea, kick him in the ice hole!"