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Joke of the Day

"Whats the worst part about sex with children? Cleaning the blood out of the clown costume when you are finished."

"Hugh Jackman and Kevin Spacey are sitting at a dinner party.... Hugh Jackman says, ""Hey, Kevin, can you pass the salt?"" Kevin Spacey replies, ""No soap, radio!"""

"Every day can be Friday if you're really irresponsible."

"Oh no! An Xbox One and PS4 just had a head on collision... CALL AN AMBULANCE! WiiU WiiU WiiU WiiU WiiU"

"Touch me, taste me, bite me, blow me, suck me, fcuk me, nice and slowly...but if you kiss me don't be hasty...use your tongue and make it tasty !! "

"I was just sentenced to Prison for my part in a timeshare fraud. I have to go to prison for two weeks every year for 20 years."

"Went to the store without my iPhone. Felt like I traveled back in time. Saw a dinosaur. Realized I actually traveled back in time."

"What did the slut's left leg say to the slut's right leg? Nothing. They've never met."

"What did one snowman say to the other? Do you smell carrots??"

"I asked a scientist how close humanity is to speed-of-light travel ""We're relatively far off."""